The following comes from mini-AIR (mini-Annals of Improbable Research ). I thank Hubert Turner for bringing this to my attention.

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2002-12-06              Pocket-Gopher-Lice Poets

The judges in the first and last annual POCKET-GOPHER-LICE 
LIMERICK COMPETITION were heartened to see how many people could 
not stop themselves from composing limericks that explore the the 
research report:

        "Comparative Body Size Relationships in Pocket Gophers
        and Their Chewing Lice," by Serge Morand, et al.,
        which explained that:
                Our study of gopher hair-shaft diameter and louse
                head-groove dimensions suggest that there is a
                "lock-and-key" relationship between these
                two anatomical features.
        [for the full citation, see last month's mini-AIR]

The winning poets and limericks are:

INVESTIGATOR LEILA Z. HADJ-CHIKH:
A louse that could leave like a rocket
Stayed put on a Thomomy's pocket.
  The louse only gripped
  On gophers equipped
With hairs that could fit in its socket.

INVESTIGATOR GREG CARTER:
Pocket Gopher said, "Isn't that nice?
They've been researching my chewing lice,
  And the width of my hair
  Doth directly compare
With the size of their head-groove device!"

INVESTIGATOR JUDITH PHILIP: 
A louse wanted a chew
at a pocket gopher or two.
  He chose for his host
  one whose fur was the most
fitting. Well, wouldn't you?

INVESTIGATOR GARY DRYFOOS:
As the hair on our gopher grows thicker
So, too, do the lice there that lick 'er.
Pocket-gopher/louse teething
's a "lock-and-a-key" thing.
The lice just get fatter, and snicker.


These and several notable runners-up will be featured later this 
month on the AIR web site.


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